Friday , December 15 2017
Home / Powerful Inspiring Stories / 6 Ways To Live Well With A Chronic Illness

6 Ways To Live Well With A Chronic Illness

Living with chronic illness comes with its own set of unique challenges but it doesn’t mean that life has to be one terrible ordeal.

Often, we don’t look ill and we can still manage to hold down a job. We have families and a bit of a social life. Despite these things, we still feel terrible.

It’s like having the flu every day, with maybe an odd hour or two of relief.

Living with a chronic illness brings with it the challenge of honoring ourselves while also living up to the expectations and responsibilities of being alive. Often, that includes extreme pain, exhaustion or a hidden disability.

The hardest part can be that because we don’t look ill and we do our best, family and friends can forget. They can even become frustrated with us. As a result, we become frustrated with them and we get angry at ourselves for being ill.

These feelings of guilt and frustration can lead to arguments. Sometimes, they can also push us into a deeper sense of depression and deprivation.

Why us? What did we do wrong?

Despite all the questions you may have in your mind, remember that there is a way to live well. It can be a challenging work but living with chronic illness is possible.

Below, I’ll show you how.

First, we need to grieve

grieving chronic illness

We need to grieve for the life we are not going to live or might never live. We need to grieve for the lost time, missed events, and missed opportunities.

And grieving is tough, especially when we are told we can think our way out of it or we, on some metaphysical level, asked for this. This ‘magical’ thinking or any other general new age BS does not help us when we are deep in the mire of seeing our lives crumble beneath us.

We are ill.

Most of us are still desperately searching for a cure. But to continue with this journey, we must accept where we are.

Grieve the loss of the life you don’t have. Grieving comes in waves and must be honored.

However, you should remember that grieving does come to an end once there’s acceptance. So, accept how life is and get on with it.

Let’s live it well- even within the restrictions of the disease.

Which means boundaries

Boundaries keep you safe. They keep your pain down and they keep you sane. They don’t mean brick walls.

Instead, think of them as flexible fences that control what comes in and goes out. Learning to set your fences can be hard. But once done, you’ll wish you were able to do it years ago.

Boundaries let you stop worrying. And when you worry, you increase your stress levels and even your pain. It becomes an endless cycle that damages you more.

Strong boundaries ensure things get done, toxic people stay away, and you stop over giving.

So, sort out what type of boundaries you need. Get others on board, remind them when they are overstepping your boundary, and stick to your guns.

The boundaries you put in place will be unique to you.

Honesty with yourself and others

I feel this follows on naturally after the grieving process and boundaries.

You are going to disappoint people.

You can’t do everything. You’ll have limits due to your illness.

Being honest about this is the best way forward. Explain that you only have so much energy. Give a warning when that energy starts to deplete and plan how you’ll leave if this has not already been done. Then when ready, put your plan into action.

Do not push through!

Pushing through is for emergencies or once in a lifetime events only. The consequences of pushing through are harsh. They mean days in bed, increased pain and increased brain fog.

And often for what? So other people will like you more?

People without a chronic illness can bounce back after 5 minutes, but what about you?

You’ll crash and can’t move.

Listen to your body. Honor when it talks to you and for the love of all that is, don’t push through!

Drop the guilt

It is not your fault that you are ill and it is not your fault that you have limitations. It’s just not your fault so stop feeling guilty.

I can’t stress this enough.

It has taken me years to drop the guilt but finally, it is happening.

This is life.

By accepting ourselves as we are, we make it easier for others to accept us as we are. If we present to the world who we really are without the guilt, the world will reflect that back to us. People that can’t honor this will walk away.

Pamper days that are more than pamper days

Pamper days to me are ‘women going to a spa’.

Well, that is not enough.

Living with chronic illness means we miss out big time.

For me, a pamper day is planning a day where I don’t miss out. I don’t do what anyone else wants or needs me to do. This day is for me to experience what I need to experience to feel alive. This may be a visit to an art gallery, a trip to friends, a simple stroll or a wheelchair visit outdoors.

Too often, we are bounded to our beds and houses and this is bad for us on all fronts.

If you can’t get out, bring the pamper day to you. Have your friends come around and cook for you, have a tea party or a picnic in the back garden. Do what feeds your soul and not what feeds others!

pamper days

But again, don’t push through.

Be strategic about coping with your energy/pain levels.

Love

I am so lucky that I have a partner who understands that I have an illness one can’t see. It wasn’t always like this, but we are now at a point where our routine honors his needs and mine. He knows I’m not pulling a fast one. He can now recognize when exhaustion sets in and if I need to be in bed, then I’m in bed.

It has taken time and patience to get here. Education and seeing medical results have been instrumental, but I’m so glad we have hung in there.

It hasn’t been easy for my daughter, either. She can’t remember a time that I was not ill. As a result, she can read me like a book and sense within a second when I’m flagging. I have done my best to parent her the best I can, but this has sadly meant she has grown up way too fast for my liking.

She spins it and says she is independent and she is. I can’t deny that her love has helped immeasurably, but at a cost to her childhood.

But, what if you don’t have love?

Join clubs or groups. You can even search for virtual ones. Facebook seems to be a suitable place for support and advice. Just try and avoid the toxic groups. We need support, not a pity party.

Which brings me on to toxic people.

What if you have a toxic relationship?

If you do, then get help or just get out. Toxic relationships stress us immeasurably.

We are far better off without them.

There is nothing worse than being ill and living with toxic family or friends. They will make you worse and you deserve better.

See Also: 8 Types of Toxic Friends That Are Holding Your Happiness Hostage

Alternative therapies

Alternative therapies are often complementary to the regular medical care many of us have. Some find them a bit ‘woo’ but I do believe the right ones have a significant role to play.

If we are truly fortunate, we have an integrative medic that practices both conventional and complementary techniques.

My illness, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, needs to be treated with several complementary therapies. Diet change has been one and I strictly follow the Auto Immune Protocol. My emotional and mental well-being has been improved with therapies like EFT. I take supplements to correct blood test results and they have improved my fatigue levels.

I still can’t do everything I want to do, so I do the best I can. I no longer beat myself up for it.

I don’t believe I am to blame for this illness and I will no longer allow people in my life that disrespect me because of it.

I see conventional medicine and alternative medicine as a partnership where they complement each other. Together, they can help a person live well.

See Also: Common Health Conditions Treated with Alternative Medicine

My life is more balanced, more loving and more fun. I have grieved, I have dropped the guilt, I have a fantastic doctor and I am loved. All these things make living with chronic illness a little easier.

The post 6 Ways To Live Well With A Chronic Illness appeared first on Dumb Little Man.

Click Here For Original Source Of The Article

Ads by WOW Trk

About Darren Webb

Hello & Welcome to my blog. My name is Darren Webb and i'm on a magical successful journey and also helping others have a more stress free relaxed life. I truly hope that you find a lot of useful information on my blog and that it helps you through your life. Please feel free to contact me at any time.

Check Also

5 Signs Your Romantic Relationship Is Worth Fighting For

Is your relationship worth fighting for? Is the stress of the struggle worth it? If you are currently in a romantic relationship or marriage and you’re having doubts about whether to fight for it or not, there are a few ways to tell. Here are 5 signs that you can put away the white flag […]

The post 5 Signs Your Romantic Relationship Is Worth Fighting For appeared first on Dumb Little Man.

4 Ways to Eliminate the Fear of Failure

You're reading 4 Ways to Eliminate the Fear of Failure, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you're enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

The fear of failure is something that all of us encounter at some point in our lives. Unfortunately, that is just the way we are programmed as humans.

On the other hand there are many different ways that you can help eliminate the fear of failure today, tomorrow and beyond.

It starts with one thing. You!

That might seem like an easy thing to do, but it isn’t. What I’ve done is broken down 4 of the Most important things you can do Today, that will help you eliminate the fear of failure.

Clear Mindset toward Your Goals

Here is something that we might not think of as extremely important, but it is.

Think of it this way, the Fear of Failure is all psychology, we start thinking about the things that we want to achieve, then our minds start fighting back. That is just the way things work, and again how we are wired.

When you go into things thinking about one thing and one thing only, your Goals, then you are already taking a very crucial step into not being afraid to fail. Your goals must be very specific and most importantly attainable.

When you put these things together you are setting yourself up for success. Mindset is always the first step to anything big, especially when it comes to better yourself overall.

Having the Right Idea of Failure

Here is a tricky one.

You might be thinking,

Why would knowing what failure is help me not fear it?

Well,

Knowing what failure is to your helps create a better understanding to what you are dealing with. Failure is different to every individual person.

For example, my biggest idea of failure is letting people down. Whereas you might be afraid not to land a job, or finish school or get that big promotion. Failure is a HUGE thing in our lives, and we are burdened each and every day with it.

Knowing what failure is to you, will help you have the right approach when combating it.

Accepting that Failure is a part of the “Process”

Now if you are anything like me, you are always working ten steps ahead of everyone else. Which that is great and all, but you will encounter failure in one form or another.

The kicker here is that you don’t have to sit there and expect failure, but you have to simply understand it is a part of the process of life. Whether you are looking to start your own business, do better as a parent, find your own motivation  or whatever the case may be, you have to accept failure.

It is natural to fear something that is inevitable, which is one of the biggest reasons why we always are discouraged when failure does hit. However, if we are heading into Life’s ventures knowing that at some point we are going to face failure, then when that time comes its easier.

Having the Right Support System

Here is the most important of these 4 ways to Eliminate the Fear of Failure, having the right Support System.

Now,

This doesn’t always have to mean having 1 person to lean on when things get rough. First and foremost you have to be able to support yourself through everything that happens in life and success. Failure is again going to happen.

You might have that one person who is there and always has believed in you no matter what, or you may have yourself.

Whatever the case may be, you must be able to count on that one person to be there when failure hits. Knowing that someone has your back, will ease your mind and oftentimes you won’t even think about the failures anymore.

Regardless,

Support is the biggest deterrent in any sort of fear based system. Once again, this is all about psychology, and if our minds aren’t thinking about failure, or don’t have to worry if failure happens, then we live our lives in a much better light.


Dustin Meyer, Editor and Writer for The Evolutionary Mind. I have
a strict passion for expressing realistic ways to help as many people as I
can, and Pride myself in the writing that I do. I'm a new Father of a
beautiful little Girl, and 2 Step Sons. Along with writing, I'm extremely
passionate about my family and bettering our lifestyle along with others
through writing, video, and branding.

You've read 4 Ways to Eliminate the Fear of Failure, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you've enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

The 7 Side Effects of Overtraining Syndrome

The 21st century is the Golden Age of Exercise. Never before has there been such a keen fixation with being fit. People go crazy over yoga, spin class, the treadmill, the elliptical, and the good old jogging/running. While the significance of exercise can’t be over-emphasized, there is such a thing as too much of a […]

The post The 7 Side Effects of Overtraining Syndrome appeared first on Dumb Little Man.

7 Ways to be a Positive Person

You're reading 7 Ways to be a Positive Person, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you're enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Want seven easy fixes to become a positive person? Few people are willing to go on a spiritual journey to become a positive person because at times it seems like a tremendous amount of work. Inspired by Jim Carrey who spent years on his spiritual journey, why not learn what he has to teach and save yourself years of searching? Here are the seven ways to be a positive person. (You need all seven to be a truly positive person, but point 1 and point 7 are the most important.)

1 – Gratitude Is Your Most Neglected Tool

Want to be positive all the time? Learn how to be grateful. People who are grateful are positive almost semi-continuously because they appreciate what they have. They appreciate the fact they can draw breath without pain, that they can eat, that people love them, and that they have the capacity to think and grow.

Ingratitude is actually the source of most misery in the world. People would not steal if they were grateful what what they had earned, and people would not cheat on their spouses if they were grateful for their love. It is very difficult to remain positive if you are miserable, and misery is caused by ingratitude.

2 – Don’t Make A Point Of Being Positive, But Make A Point Of Pulling Yourself Out Of Being Negative

They say the best way to spot a liar is to look for signs a person is telling the truth rather than trying to look for signs that the person is lying. Take a similar back-to-front approach when it comes to being positive. Pull yourself out of a negative funk rather than trying to be positive all the time.

Both Sean Stephenson and Tony Robbins say that they overcame their darkest days by allowing themselves to feel sad and negative, but not allowing themselves to stay in that position.

3 – Ask Yourself What You Have Learned From Every Event

It is difficult pulling yourself out of a negative funk. You may not feel like plastering your face with a fake smile or looking on the bright side. If that is the case, it is time to get intellectual about the situation and ask yourself what you can learn from recent events. What you learn may not help you in the future, but it certainly will not hurt you. Force yourself to learn from what has just happened, even if all that you learn is that life tries to trip you from time-to-time.

4 – Believe But Verify Rather Than Being A Tireless Skeptic

Part of being positive is learning to look on the bright side, but the world is a harsh and dangerous place where looking on the bright side may leave you in danger. We are skeptical by nature because our minds are looking for danger. Instead of losing your skepticism, you need to believe but verify.

If your daughter says she is going to sleep at her friends all night, then believe her and send her on her way, but verify what she said either beforehand, or after. Don't forget that you can verify after an event, and you can do it casually. For example, you may see your daughter’s friend when she drops her daughter off at school, where you can walk over, say hi, and say, “I hope my girl wasn’t too much of a pest when she slept over at yours on Saturday.

5 – Pray To A Creator

Follow a religion if you wish, or pray to whatever it is you think created our universe. Pray with nothing more than a thank you for your existence. Don't treat your prayers like a Christmas wish list, simply pray by saying thank you and maybe list the things you are specifically thankful for.

Before god haters start ripping this article apart on the comments section, this point is not pushing any sort of religion, you can make your own religion up if you wish, and the creator you choose can simply be an entity that humans are unable to define.

How does praying to a creator help make you a more positive person? Not only do you receive a divine sense of unexplainable warmth, you also take the focus off you and your problems and turn your attention to “Life.”

6 – A Slap On The Wrist Whenever You Do Not Look On The Bright Side

Some people are negative by default. They always look on the nasty and dark side because that is what they are used to. The idea of being optimistic appears girly, silly, weak, or childish. If you find yourself looking on the dark side, then slap yourself on the wrist. Actually give yourself a physical representation of your choice to stop being negative.

Whenever you notice yourself taking a negative path, slap yourself on the wrist because it will create a series of habitual memories in your mind that force your brain to take notice whenever you are negative. It makes it more difficult for you to be negative by accident or by default. This is not a punishment, it is a way of helping your mind recognize when you are being negative by default.

7 – Love, Money, Compassion And Equality Does Not Defeat Evil - Courage Defeats Evil

The most obvious question is, “How can I be positive in a world so rotten?” The answer is “Courage.” People may tell you that love will save the world, or understanding will change the world, or that people are good by nature and it is just their surroundings that make them bad. All of this is lies. If you want to live in a world where you proud to be positive, then be courageous and reward others for being courageous. Be proud of your courage, even if it puts you at physical risk.

A person who seeks out racists is not courageous, but a person who speaks out against something wrong even at the “risk” of being “called” racist is courageous. A sexually assaulted woman is not courageous if she forgives her attacker, but she is courageous if she presses charges, stands in the courtroom, and refuses to allow the man to get away with his crimes. A courageous person is not somebody who tries to fight a pitiful person, it is the person who dives into a pitiful fight to try to break it up.

Courage is powerful, and when courage is added to gratitude, you have all you need to be a positive and happy person.

William Grigsby is an HR expert at assignmentmasters. His passion is to show that each person is unique and can independently achieve success by applying efforts every day.William was writing in this space for 2 successful years.

Feel free to follow him on Twitter @willgrgsb

You've read 7 Ways to be a Positive Person, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you've enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

A Quick Guide on How to Clean Up Blood Spills Properly

Blood is one of those substances that are tricky to clean up. It can seep through porous materials, bind to anything it comes in contact with and stain fabrics and surfaces. Apart from those things, you also have to worry about the things you can’t really see. Blood can carry disease-causing microorganisms that can put […]

The post A Quick Guide on How to Clean Up Blood Spills Properly appeared first on Dumb Little Man.

Leave a Reply

css.php